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Q. What's red and hot?
A. Summa Strawberry!

Q. How do you make a banana nutmilkshake?
A. Jump out and yell, BOO to the banana

Q. Why is a pea small and green?
A. Because if it was large and red it would be a tomato!

Q. Why did the guy get fired from the orange juice factory?
A. He couldn’t concentrate!

Q. Why was the mushroom invited to lots of parties?
A. Because he was a fungi to be with!

Q. Why did the orange stop at the top of the hill?
A. Because it ran out of juice!

Q. Why did the man pour vegies all over the world?
A. He wanted peas on earth.

Q. Where do baby apes sleep?
A. In apricots

Q: Why did the tomato turn red?
A: Because it saw the salad dressing

Q: What vegetable might you find in your basement?
A: Cellar-y.

Q: What is green and goes to a summer camp?
A: A Brussels' scout.

Q: What vegetable do you need a plumber for?
A: A Leek.

Q: Why do potatoes make good detectives?
A: Because they keep their eyes peeled.

Q: Where did the vegetables go to have a few drinks?
A: The Salad Bar.

Q: What is small, red and whispers?
A: A hoarse radish.

Q: What vegetable can tie your stomach in knots?
A.String beans

Q: Why is it not wise to tell secrets in a cornfield?
A:There are too many ears.

Q: When is a cucumber like a strawberry?
A: When one is in a pickle and the other is in a jam.

Q: What is a Honeymoon Salad?
A: Lettuce alone, with no dressing.

Q: What did the lettuce say to the celery?
A: Quit stalking me.

Q: What do you say to rotten lettuce?
A: You should have your head examined.

Q: Why did the Tomato go out with a prune?
A: Because he couldn't find a date!

Boy Melon: Honey, can we run away and get married?
Girl Melon: Sorry, I cantaloupe.

Two carrots are riding in a car and they get into a terrible accident. They're rushed to a hospital. One carrot has only scrapes and bruises, but the other carrot is rushed to surgery. Hours later the doctor comes out and says to the first carrot, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your friend is going to live. The bad news is that he's going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life.

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